I wonder if there are other countries where their police is out on the streets every morning, controlling traffic flow at every intersection. Don’t get me wrong, I’m super thankful to the men and women doing their jobs, it’s just the streets and traffic system which are failing.

Why do some people think it’s ok to go against the rules just to be at work faster? Offense for money (in terms of salary), sounds like robbing a bank, crime for money. I know this analogy is a tad far, but you get the idea.

It’s been so long and I can’t believe I am still receiving comments about me returning to Malaysia is a mistake. I make my mistakes, I make my shit, you don’t get to judge.

Ah RANT.

Throwing all the work flight tickets felt like a rite of passage to me

I’m with a new company. It’s still okay up to this point, I have not dreaded going to work in the morning. A typical day would be getting up at 5.30, being in office at 7.30, leaving at 6.00, then reaching home at 9.00pm. All I really have time for at home is spent on my bed, on weekdays that is.

There’s a number of reasons why I quit my last job, not gonna go into too much details. It was a combination of unmet promises, feeling of not being required, and limited growth potential. I’m glad I left, and that my mind is in a better place right now. Not me being at a great company right now (time will tell). Back then I just woke up every day thinking, what can I do today? I operated in the grey area where I am required to do some things, but I am told not to do some things. And I am supposed to achieve certain things when I am not allowed to do those things. Yup, that’s all the detail I can give here.

Overall I’d say I have been doing relatively above average.

They're amazing

September 2016 I got to see one of my favorite group Chvrches live. It was phenomenal. The first second of the music of every song plays and you know the lyrics to the entire song and your brain sends chills to your whole body and you start screaming and moving your body and worshipping your gods on stage. It was held on a rooftop car parking so the setting was awesome too.

Nippon cat showing no love to me 

October 2016 my friend and I went to Japan. This decision was made less than a month in advance if I’m not mistaken, and boy was it the best decision ever made in a long long time. I knew I would definitely enjoy even more if I knew more Japanese, but it didn’t matter anyway. I still liked it, definitely going back (not sure when), and the GIRLS ARE CUTE.

November came and my training to US was not approved. (cancelled/postponed/another person went, pick the vocab you want, I mean this was one of the signs I guess) I didn’t really mind as much as the other people who have never been to the US. All I wanted was to see the HQ for myself, see the people there for myself, and know that my suffering at work in Malaysia will not be in vain, and it’s all worth it. So that didn’t happen, the trip and the motivation boost I needed so badly.

December was a month. A month where a few buddies and I took a roadtrip, drank almost every day till people get wasted, talked to sweet random girls and basically did nothing. It was fun.

January, the road trip vibe didn’t just pass on, we were drinking more than ever. My family had to endure some things, so I really took up drinking. When in Bangkok for the sales meeting (where I felt I was ignored almost at all times), I drank. I drank every single day. After the meeting I stayed back in Bangkok for a little vacation, stayed at a hostel alone, wandered around Bangkok alone, drank alone. This was when I would drink two large bottles of beer in the afternoon by the streets for lunch etc. This was also where I met cool people at the hostel, hung out, talked to early hours in the morning, and thought life could have been so much more interesting.

very unqualified person conducting training

February, work has been a deep shit hole where you won’t even know it’s a hole because it’s so wide and so deep it felt like a shit ocean. I had a work assignment in Singapore and here in Malaysia I was being accused of not doing my work and constantly wanting to be outstation. Not gonna discuss why that happened as it did, just a factual recollection. I completed the assignment, got praises in Singapore, got back to Malaysia and quit. It was also at this point where I thought, maybe I am drinking too much, and I should probably stop. So I stopped for a month just to know for sure I’m not addicted to drinking, and I didn’t feel like shit.

March was great. I was slowly being released off my leash. I finished off anything I have started, did what I had to do, but I never informed anyone that I was leaving. I just didn’t want to go into that with people whom I wasn’t comfortable with. My mind was getting clearer, I felt like a person again.

Walkin on east coast sand

April, GREAT FUCKING MONTH. I still get calls from people at work asking me things, but I was free. I spent my time as a full-time son at home. Maybe some interviews which were handed to me. (I went on a total of 6 this year) Yea I think we went to east coast Malaysia but that was that. Fun, not bad.

Hey Jannine

I don’t even know what happened in May. Oh wait I went to Bangkok, again. Stayed at the same hostel but this time with a friend. The two times I’ve been this year were just so different. First time I was merely walking around, eating, looking, and hanging out with hostel people. Second time we went for like movies, cat café, a nice artsy area, walk around the streets of Bangkok at 3am, saw a youtube star I followed in person, went to mens bar (sort of). All for good fun, all for good fun.

And then work. I started on June 1^st. Better pay, slightly more people in the office. Once I started traveling I met up with friends in different places, just like old days. And hey I’m not the youngest in the office, I’m sort of a senior, to one person at least, a one-month seniority.

Honestly at this point I can’t even think of a holiday destination. I mean yeah I’d love to go to the UK, but I don’t think I have the funds right now. Japan, ugh probably just wait for company things. Taiwan, I’m just not feeling it now. Hmmmmm. Staying put isn’t that bad either I guess, I can live with it.

Wow how did this post turn into a calendar? Of course, work things remains to be seen. As for my last job I guess it hasn't been all bad, I have learned what not to do, what to do, made a group of friends, and also learning more about myself and how I fit into the world we live in, which is a very bad fit anyways. We learn more as we take on each day, that's how it's going to be. 

Till next freakin time.