It's been almost two months now. Working has not been entirely pleasant but I'd believe there are others who are dealing with worse situations. Honestly it could just be that I am way too sensitive and that I have lived the way I wanted to for way too long, so once something is different from how I do things, I couldn't cope. Things are getting way better now.

I know I talked a lot about leaving and such and such, but when I think about it, staying isn't so bad after all. The times you feel good just because you are there to have breakfast with your parents, the times when my grandma thinks I'm super smart and earning a lot even though I'm not, and friends whom I can almost always meet just because I am here.

The thing about leaving is that I know I would never actually fit in that new environment, and it's the adapting and differences which is fun. I might lose my accent, I might think like the others, but that will be it, just for now. That opens me up to perhaps learn Portuguese, and have fun trying to adapt to Icelandic life.

Being in this field isn't even the worst, it's actually legit. Yes maybe in ten years I might just be a manager or doing the same work at a competitor's company, but why let it happen? If these don't make me sad I could totally live with it. If I do feel these are not my thing, who is it to say that I can't go and start selling really ugly cakes or something.

I'm 23 now by the way. And quarter life crisis should've happened years ago, since I don't believe I will live very long. So anyway I was so caught up with the idea of, so I have graduated, I'm moving to another phase, good lord let me make one really good decision which will hand me a good life. That idea was pretty funny actually. Now that I look at decisions as little things I choose to do day to day, and not one crazy ass humongous YES or NO, life isn't so bad. Take little steps one at a time, open up a little week by week. Not only am I young, my brain has never been utilized during my study years so I could really use it now. Like, do I get strawberry sundae or oreo mcflurry.

YAY.